


steve doesn't know what knocking is (and no one knows how to lock a door)

by LocalLibraryGremlin



Series: yeah there gay keep scrolling [1]
Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Angst, Dorks in Love, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Just description, Kissing, M/M, Making Out, No Smut, also no one knows how to lock a door, mama Steve, my first fanfic in this fandom I watched all of the show in three weeks so be prepared, steve doesn't know what knocking is, walked in on
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-29
Updated: 2019-08-29
Packaged: 2020-09-28 21:49:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,923
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20432990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LocalLibraryGremlin/pseuds/LocalLibraryGremlin
Summary: Basically the title. 5+1 of Steve walking in on his friends, then getting caught himself. (not smut)Also features Steve being everyone's Mom, and sometimes bringing Robin along for the ride.(Takes place after episode 3 and ignores the other stuff, also please pretend that Dustin's friends question why he isn't there)





	steve doesn't know what knocking is (and no one knows how to lock a door)

**Author's Note:**

> first story for this fandom! please be nice to me I tried.

1.

Steve isn't always the smartest person-Robin makes sure that he is aware of that-but he likes to think that he's developed a pretty decent moral code. And part of that moral code is making sure that the kids are okay. Because there kids and they've been through a lot of shit, and that leads to trauma, and teenage hormones and trauma aren't exactly the best combination, and-you get the point.

So, of course Steven was going to check on Dustin, who had been acting very strange. Not even just in a normal Dustin way. He had seemed...just really sad lately. And then Lucas had asked Steve if Dustin was avoiding him, and then Steve realized that, yeah, Dustin had been avoiding both Lucas and the topic of Lucas, and then he got even more worried.

So, he went to the Henderson's to go talk to the kid.

Thankfully, Ms Henderson was used to his presence, and didn't even blink an eye when Steve said that he came to hang out. She asked him if he wanted any brownies and told him that Dustin was in his room.

So, one brownie later, Steve decided to let himself into Dustin's bedroom. Where him and Lucas where kissing. Sloppily. Not making-out sloppy, but 'fourteen year old boys kiss for the first time' sloppy.

Lucas had one hand and Dustin's shoulder and the other on his cheek, and appeared to be taking the lead in the kiss. Dustin was bright red and had his hands loosely placed on Lucas's thighs. Steve could see there noses bumping together, and he could see that Dustin was smiling, which probably wasn't making kissing easier.

“Shit.” Steve said, loudly.

Both boys turned around and stared at Steve. Dustin turned even more red, and Lucas pointed to the door.

“Get out!”

“Right, shit-sorry guys, um, enjoy yourselves, uh Dustin-we can talk later.” And with that, Steve went to the other end of the hallway.

He then proceeded to sit there for around five minutes, before Dustin and Lucas came out. Steve noticed that Lucas and Dustin where holding hands, and that Dustin was gripping to the other boy so tightly that his knuckles where white.

“Steve,” Lucas started, looking at Dustin, who nodded in approval. “Dustin and I are dating.”

“Yeah I figured that out.”

“Please don't hate us.” Dustin choked out, and Steve noticed that he had tears in his eyes.

Steve stood up, and Lucas wrapped an arm around Dustin's shoulders.

“Hey, hey, hey, I don't hate you guys, I'm happy for you two, alright? Unless your cheating on Max, Sinclair, because then I'd have to kick your ass.”

“I'm not cheating on Max, we're just covering for each other.” Lucas rolled his eyes.

“And I'm not actually dating Suzie, either. Though she is real, but she's also gay, so I'm her cover story. She's pretty cool, I think you'd like her.” Dustin rambled, before hugging Steve.

“We also got together, like, ten minutes ago, so you can't tell anyone.” Lucas said, while fiddling with Dustin's hair.

“Cool, cool, I can keep a secret.” Steve squeezed Dustin back, before releasing the kid. He then stretched to his full height. “Just stay safe, keep the doors locked, um, safe sex is great sex-don't have sex, you shouldn't be having sex, your very young, but if you do, be safe, and lock the door, um, don't have sex in cars-”

“We get it Steve!” Dustin yelled, his ears turning pink. Lucas laughed and kissed his cheek, and Dustin grinned goofily.

Steve smiled at them.

In a shocking turn of events, Dustin's mood evaluated, and he and Lucas began to spend much more time together.

2.

So after that fiasco, Steve was prepared for a simple summer, of helping Dustin with love problems, scooping ice cream with Robin, and solving Russian spy codes.

Then Thursday came along and fucked that right up.

“Hello welcome to Scoops Ahoy-Holy shit Byers?!”

Will Byers looked awful. He was drenched in sweat, the collar of his shirt was damp from it. He was crying, and obviously had been for a while. His eyes where bloodshot, his cheeks where red and chapped from the salt, and his tear tracks went down his neck. His bottom lip was quivering, he was trembling, and he had clearly starting pulling on his hair at some point. His eyes where round and terrified, and he didn't really seem to notice where he was.

Next to him was Mike, who had puffy eyes and was holding onto Will. The taller boy was trying to remain calm, but Steve could see the panic in his eyes. He had one arm tightly wrapped around Will's shoulders, and was holding Will's hand with his other.

“Will had some sort of...episode, and I was wondering if he could stay back here until he calms down?” Mike asked in a shaky voice.

“Don't leave, please don't leave, Mike, there gonna' get me, gonna get me, Mikey please, don't let them, I don't wanna' go back, so cold so dark, _please-”_ Will choked on a sob and was starting to hyperventilate, Mike visibly tightened his hold on him, and Steve ushered them both into the back.

“Okay, okay, it's okay kid, your okay, just sit here,” Will flinched as Steve led him and Mike into the back, ignoring Robin, Dustin, and Lucas. Steve just continued his stream of hopefully comforting words. “Yeah, just sit with Mike, when my shift's over I'll take you home-”

“NO!” Will shouted, nearly tumbling over, Mike pulling him back to his chest. “No, no, it knows my home, it knows where to find me, it'll get me, nononononono-”

“Will what happened?!” Dustin yelled as Mike started whispering soft words in Will's ears.

“Wheeler?” Lucas said in a slightly accusing tone, as he sat next to them. Dustin already had his arms around Will, who was currently sobbing into Mike's chest.

“I-I took Will to the mall to buy him something, b-because I was such an _asshole _yesterday, and I found this neat pin that I thought he'd like, and then I couldn't _find_ Will, and I started searching for him, and it took a while because I didn't know where he went, and t-then I found him by the fountain, and he was _yelling _and _crying_, and then I-I shook him and asked what was wrong, and then he started crying more, and then I took him here.” Mike rambled, stifling back a sob and burying his face in Will's hair.

“Will, we're never going to let the Demogorgon get you.” Dustin said, pressing his cheek against Will's back, throat tight with tears.

“We're here for you, okay? We will protect you, from the Demogorgon, from the Mind Flayer, from the Lab, all of it, okay?” Lucas said, rubbing both Will's back and stroking Dustin's hair.

“W-We love you so much Will, so much.” Mike mumbled into his hair. “Your amazing and wonderful, and you're going to be okay, and _nothing _ever going to hurt you again, a-and I'm so fucking sorry for everything yesterday, but it's okay because I'm gonna take you home, and your gonna be warm, and we're going to play as much DnD as you fucking want, okay?”

Robin shot Steve a look of _what the fuck, _then Steve shot her one of _I'll explain soon, just give them a minute._ Robin then slowly went up to the kids.

“Will?” She said softly. “I'm Robin, and I don't really know what's going on, but I promise that your safe here.”

She then awkwardly patted him on the head.

Eventually, the kids all separated from Will, except for Mike, who still held on to him tightly. Will sniffled, hiccuped, and looked around the room.

“Where am I?” He asked softly.

Steve kneeled in front of him. “Your in the back room of Scoops Ahoy. You are with Dustin, Lucas, Mike, and my shitty coworker Robin.” Robin smacked Steve on the head.

“Hey.” Will said softly, staring at Dustin and Lucas. He then turned to Mike. “Hey.”

Mike grinned, more tears running down his cheeks. “Hey, you.”

***

Will and Mike ended up staying there for another two hours. Then Steve took them home. Steve ended up having to tell Joyce about the incident, and then got yelled at by Joyce, so that was fun.

Anyways, it was the next day, and Steve was still worried about Will. So, after his shift, he grabbed Robin and they went to the Wheeler house, with a tub of ice cream between them.

“So what happened to Will?” Robin asked, tapping her fingers on the ice cream.

“He basically got caught in another dimension, and a bunch of monsters tried to kill him.”

“Okay.” Robin sighed. “I honestly expect anything by this point.”

Steve laughed.

Anyways, they pulled up to the Wheeler household, Ted let them in without question because Ted doesn't care. They put the ice cream in the freezer, and then checked the basement for the boys. When they didn't find them there, they checked Mike's bedroom. This time they definitely found them.

Will and Mike where on the bed, and Mike had one hand on Will's waist and one on his cheek, and Will had his arms Around Mike's shoulders, one hand fiddling with his hair. And they where kissing, sweetly, like stupid teenagers in love.

“Hey guys.” Steve said, casual as ever. “Sorry to interrupt, but we brought ice cream.”

They separated so fast that Mike accidentally knocked Will clean off the bed. Will yelped, and Mike started a string of apologies.

“Will I'm so sorry-GET OUT STEVE-are you hurt? Did you hit your head?” Mike said, softening his voice after yelling at Steve.

Will looked like he was going to cry again.

“Hey don't worry, I'm very happy for you two, you don't have to worry, Will don't cry, Will please stop crying, Will there isn't anything to cry about-” Steve rambled, hands in the air in surrender.

Since Robin was the one in there friendship who actually had a braincell, she went and helped Will off of the ground.

“No one's upset, kid. I'm also gay, so it would be really hypocritical of me to judge.” She said, ruffling Will's hair.

Mike smiled slightly, before wrapping an arm around Will's waist.

“You guys can't tell anyone.” He said. Will nodded next to him.

“Course not, we know how this works.” Steve said. “Just, you know, be subtle in public, keep the door closed, tell your friends when you're ready, don't even try to have sex your way to young-”

“Please shut up.” Mike blushed brightly, and Will buried his face in Mike's shoulder.

“Okay dingus, let's go.” And Robin dragged Steve out.

3.

Today, Steve was at the police station. Not because he got arrested, but because he wanted to know the legal repercussions of keeping the nail bat in his trunk. And he also wanted to know what would happen if he, hypothetically, egged Billy's car.

So, he was down at the police station, and after making some small talk with the secretary, barged into Hopper's office because that's just how people do things in Hawkins.

And boy oh boy was he surprised by what he saw.

Joyce was sitting on the desk, and Hopper was between her legs. They where kissing fiercely, and noisily. Joyce's hands where gripping into Hopper's back, and Steve could see Hopper gripping onto Joyce's ass, and he was uncomfortable.

“Hey!” Steve yelled, sounding like a disappointed parent. “What the hell is going on here?!”

The two separated, Joyce looking flushed and embarrassed, and Hopper looking similar. Only for a second though, because then they just looked annoyed.

“Harrington, get out of my office.” Hopper yelled.

Steve merely rolled his eyes at them. “I can't believe you two-Hopper you have a nice secluded cabin, why would you do this at the _police station_? And Ms Byers, you also have a house!”

“Okay, kid, your not yelling at us-”

“Uh, yes, I am! This is a police station, and you are both adults, not hormonal teenagers! And Hopper, doesn't Ms Byers deserve better then this?! Unbelievable!”

And then Steve left.

4.

So after that, Steve had decided to 'fuck the law!' and was instead just going to get permission from Max to egg Billy's car. So, he was at the Wheeler's again, but unfortunately Max wasn't there.

Mike and Will had taken the couch, with Will snuggled between Mike's legs and resting on his chest. Mike was alternating between resting his chin on Will's head, or playfully biting his ear. Will was attempting to read a comic, but was instead mostly giggling.

Meanwhile, Dustin and Lucas where sitting at the DnD table, working on some science project and arguing. Steve noticed that Dustin was leaning on Lucas's shoulder, and that Lucas had wrapped his ankle around Dustin's. Steve did a secret little nod of approval.

“Hey jackasses, where's Max?”

Mike looked at Steve, and frowned. “Who the hell let you in?”

“Karen. And you didn't answer the question.”

“Max isn't here today.” Lucas answered. “I think that she's with El at Hopper's.”

“Well fuck.” Steve sighed.

Dustin snorted. “What's wrong?”

“I caught Hopper and Ms Byers in a...compromising situation. So this is gonna be awkward as hell.”

Will sat up. “What does that mean?”

“It means they were making out, babe.” Mike then pulled Will back to his chest.

“You guys are gross.” Lucas said, resting his head on Dustin's.

“You're one to fucking talk.”

“I'm going to Hopper's. Bye.” Steve then left the Wheeler house.

***

Hopper opened up the door. “Harrington.”

“Hopper.”

“That's Chief Hopper to you.”

Steve walked in. “Is Ms Byers here?”

“I will shoot you.”

“Is Max here?”

“She's with El. Knock before entering, they might be sleeping.” Hopper then went to the kitchen to plan murder or something.

Steve nodded, and went to El's bedroom. The door was slightly open. Max and El where sitting on the bed together. And they were kissing, because seeing people kissing was apparently just his destiny.

They were sitting across from each other, Max cupping El's cheek, and El thumbed at one of her braids. The two girls where holding hands as they kissed. Steve could hear them giggling, and he was pretty sure that he had heard El call Max 'pretty'.

Deciding not to be a creep, Steve decided to just pretend he didn't see anything, and simply knocked on the door.

Max and El both answered.

“Hi.” El said softly.

“Hey El. Hey Max.” He smiled at them. “I just wanted to ask Max something.”

“Did you see us?” Max blurted out after he was finished.

“Yes, and I am very happy for the both of you. Just stay safe, you probably shouldn't do PDA in public, because we live in Hawkins, um, El, if Max does anything to make you uncomfortable, talk to her about it, because Max doesn't want to you be uncomfortable. Oh! And don't have sex.”

“Sex?” El asked.

“Don't worry about it.” Max said, blushing. She kissed El's cheek. “I'll explain it later.”

El smiled, and turned pink after the kiss. “Not mad? Max said people could be mad.”

“Not mad at all.” Steve poked her nose. “Anyways, Max, I was wondering if I could egg Billy's car.”

5.

Max vetoed the idea of Steve egging Billy's car (Mostly because she was worried that Billy would blame her, and petty revenge could go fuck itself if it meant that Max got hurt), so it was back to slinging ice cream and solving Russian spy codes.

Meanwhile, Jonathan and Nancy had broken up. It was a very chill breakup, they had remained friends and were both still able to work at there internship together. It was the talk of the office, apparently.

Now, Steve secretly lives for drama, so he had decided to ask his two sorta-friends what happened. He was shocked by what he found out: they where both gay.

So after Steve had his appropriate shocked reaction and Nancy threatened to slap him if he told anyone, he gave them both hugs and told them he was happy for them.

(He also had a serious of weird dreams about Jonathan but that was to be analyzed at a later time.)

Anyways, the three of them had started hanging out more, and thus they all became closer, overcame there differences, the usual things that come along with friendships when you have complicated history with people.

(This lead to more weird dreams about Jonathan, but again, later.)

So, Nancy and Jonathan started coming to Scoops Ahoy, to chat with Steve and buy ice cream. This had lead to Nancy meeting Robin. And boy oh boy had Steve never seen Robin so goddamn tongue-tied in front of anyone than a dress-up Nancy Wheeler complaining about the dicks at her work while Jonathan awkwardly watched.

“...And they all call me Nancy Drew like I'm some _meddling kid, _as if they would ever have coffee if it weren't for me, because otherwise they would all just be sitting on there asses wondering 'wheres the coffee? Wheres the coffee?' One day, I'm going to poison there fucking coffee!”

“Nance this is a family establishment.” Steve said, awkwardly smiling as he handed some frowning lady her ice cream.

Robin was bright red and grinning. “You should use anti-freeze, it tastes sweet and they wouldn't notice a difference.”

Nancy grinned back. “Damn right I should.” Nancy then gave Robin a weird little smirk and looked her up and down. “What's your name, anyways?”

“Oh, um, I'm Robin, I work...here,” Robin gestured to the sail suit. “Which is why I'm wearing this.”

Nancy gave her a weird little smile. “It looks nice on you.”

Robin's jaw dropped, and then she gave Nancy a rather goofy grin. “You look nice too.”

Jonathan gave them both a look, and then gave Steve a look, and then Steve grinned at Jonathan and tried not to think about his weird dreams.

Nancy and Jonathan left after that, and Robin cheerfully scooped ice cream and hummed to herself, and Steve was wondering how to tactfully tell her that she should totally ask Nancy out.

“Hey did you know that me and Nancy used to date?”

Tact was not his strong suit.

Robin froze, and then visibly deflated. “Really?”

“Yeah, but she's single now, and that was clearly flirting, and you would have something to hold over my head, so why not ask her out?”

“Steve, do you know how awkward that would be?”

“Who cares?”

Robin rolled her eyes and turned to him. “Steve-”

“I don't care, you obviously find her attractive, she finds you attractive, so ask.”

Robin just turned around and shrugged. “I'll think about it.”

***

So Steve was back at the Wheelers because Dustin was there and Dustin had questions about how to keep Lucas's nosy little sister out of there private life, and then El asked how many inches she had to keep her door open to kiss Max (Steve said to shut it because Hopper wouldn't suspect a thing), and then Mike asked what to do when Will cries because the boy is clueless, and what was supposed to be a ten minute visit to answer Dustin's question and pick up Nancy turned into a thirty minute visit and he felt like a mom.

However, when he finally went to Nancy's bedroom and opened up the door, he was a little bit surprised.

“Hey Nance I-HOLY SHIT ROBIN?!”

So Nancy was on top of Robin, straddling her, and they where kissing very fiercely, and Robin was trying to get Nancy's work dress off and Nancy was gripping Robin's hips and Steve was pretty sure that he saw tongue.

The girls separated quickly. “STEVE! Holy hell have you ever heard of knocking?!” Nancy screaming at him, pulling her dress down.

“So you asked her out!” Steve said, pointing to Robin.

“Steve, get out, _now_.” Robin said, in a very threatening tone.

“I'll be waiting by the car, come out when your ready.”

As Steve tried to escape the situation, Steve got accosted by the kids.

“Is Nancy okay?” Mike asked.

“Yes she's fine don't go up there.”

+1.

Steve was at the Byer's, because Mike and Will where coming out and they wanted Steve there for some reason. It had gone well, Joyce told the boys that she would always love them, and Jonathan took a photo. Afterwards, the boys had gone to Will's room, and now Jonathan was talking to Steve outside.

“I thought that it was pretty badass the way that you trapped that monster.” Steve said, grinning at Jonathan. He smiled even wider when Jonathan tipped his head back and laughed.

“Yeah...it wasn't perfect though. You where pretty good with the nailbat.”

“Thanks.” Steve shuffled a little closer to Jonathan. “I kinda wish that we hung out more after that.”

Jonathan gave him a shy look that Steve couldn't pin down. “Me too.”

It was silent for a bit. “You know, I'm really sorry for everything that year. I-I treated you like shit-”

“Don't worry about it.” Jonathan waved him off. “You...you've really improved since then.”

“I tried.” Steve blushed slightly. “I'm glad that you like the camera. I know that it wasn't as good as your old one, but I couldn't find the same model, and Radioshack only had so many that I could afford-”

“You got me the camera?” Jonathan asked him, eyes wide.

Steve could feel his blush spread, up to his ears and down his neck. Jonathan was looking at him like he was wonderful, and Steve wondered what he did that made him deserve that. Steve nodded slightly.

Jonathan grinned at him like Steve had given him a goddamn galaxy, and Steve remembered that the last time his chest pounded like this was when Nancy used to smile at him, and he wondered if Jonathan's eyes where always that pretty.

He leaned in a little bit. “I always noticed you. I don't know if you knew that. I know that a lot of kids didn't, but I did.”

And then Jonathan did a little laugh thing, and actually closed the distance between them. And it turns out that Jonathan was a great kisser, and he knew where to put his hands (on Steve's hips), and _wow _Jonathan was a lot more dominant then he had expected, and then they were on the grass, rolling on the grass, and Steve probably had dead grass in his hair, and Jonathan was giggling into his mouth, and two years ago Steve would have been pissed to have Jonathan laugh at him, but now he just laughed back and felt something very _very_ close to love. And god, Steve could love Jonathan. Steve could so easily love Jonathan.

“Holy shit!”

“GET SOME STEVE!”

Steve and Jonathan pulled apart, and looked up to see the kids, yes, all of them, on the porch. Lucas had been the first to yell, and Dustin joined in after him.

“Leave some room for Jesus!” Mike decided to screech.

Will then started giggling, and cupped his hands around his mouth and shouted. “Don't have sex, _you're too young!”_

“Get a room!” Max yelled at them, before whooping. El was kissed her cheek, and cheered for them.

Steve snorted, and hide this face in Jonathan's shoulder.

They where gonna be fine.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you all enjoyed, please leave a comment if you feel it is necessary. even if you just wanna judge my grammar.


End file.
